Doreen Virtue, bestselling author of numerous books, including “Healing With the Angels,” “How to Hear Your Angels,” “Assertiveness for Earth Angels” and “Angel Detox,” joined Elevated Existence founder Tammy Mastroberte to talk about her newest book “Don’t Let Anything Dull Your Sparkle: How to Break Free From Drama & Negativity,” in a call for Elevated Existence Annual Subscribers.
What is our sparkle? it’s our light, our joy, sense of inner peace, health, ability to focus, motivation and happiness. But what if our sparkle becomes dull? How does that happen, and how can we get it back?
Virtue, who holds a B.A., M.A. and Ph.D. in counseling psychology, and is a lifelong clairvoyant who is best known for working with the angelic realm, explains this and more in her new book, and shared her insights during the live call.
She said she learned more from writing this book than any other book she has ever written, and hopes people will begin to understand the reason there are addictions, including addictions to drama, is because many people have been traumatized and don’t even realize it.
“Scientists are now finding that symptoms of trauma which happen to those who were in wars, are happening to everybody who has ever been in any kind of situation where they feared for their life,” Virtue explained on the call. “I poured over scientific studies for this book, and found that things we think are normal are now qualifying for the diagnosis of post-traumatic stress disorder. The latest diagnostic manual that psychologists and psychiatrists use has over 600,000 ways you can be traumatized.”
Whether it’s having someone close to us die or moving to a new home, these things leave a mark on us. It comes down to whether or not something reorganizes our sense of safety in this world, she explained. We can even suffer secondary PTSD from hearing someone else tell their story, whether from a friend or a on the news.
“Scientists can pinpoint your brain chemistry and body chemistry changes when reading or watching the news,” she shared. “We have to be very discerning about what we watch, and even what is on our social media news feed. Compassion and empathy run deep in our bodies, and we can feel other people’s feelings as if they were our own. Now we have very real evidence that what we hang on to hurts our health.”
Trauma Leads to Drama
When we suffer from some form of trauma, it is not uncommon to enter into a state of hyper vigilance, looking for danger around every corner. This not only wreaks havoc on our bodies, with stress hormones cascading throughout on a regular basis, but causes of level on continuous anxiety.
“When something happens to you that is unexpected, your way to organize your future is to say, ‘I’m never going to relax again. I’m not going to let my guard down. I’m just going to completely be on edge because next time I won’t be surprised.’ That leads to chronic anxiety as you can imagine,” Virtue said.
It also leads us to attract more drama into our lives because whatever is in our conscious awareness is what we expect and attract, she noted. In the book, Virtue talks about doing on a Drama Detox. She recommends taking a one-week break from read anything dramatic. This includes staying off the social media news feed, and be discerning about what movies or television shows we watch. We should even be careful about the music we listen to during this week.
“You will notice a difference in how you feel,” she said.
Relationships & Drama
Relationships with others who are addicted to drama can also dull our sparkle. While these relationships are easier to spot in the beginning than well into the relationship, Virtue shared some tips and red flags to look out for with friends and family.
- The person complains all the time, as if they are bragging about how many problems they have in their life. They make is sound like they have “special problems” and they believe they have nothing to do with these problems. They are the victim.
- When someone tries to offer this person a solution, they get “yes, but” as an answer or an argument about why the solution won’t work. The reason is because people addicted to drama like to be the center of attention, Virtue explained. These “special problems” make them feel they are, and without them, fear they will be invisible.
- The person never asks you about how you are doing, and if they do, they don’t really care.
For those who find themselves in a relationship with someone that fits this description, it could be because it answers their own need to feel needed. This type of person will call for help with solving their problems or their latest saga, and that makes us feel good.
“It’s also an excuse for us to procrastinate on our own purpose in life. ‘I can’t abandon this person to work on my book, or do yoga or homework, because she needs me,” Virtue said.
But these relationships are hurting us more than they are helping, and moving away from them can go a long way in regaining our sparkle.
Getting Our Sparkle Back
There are several ways we can reignite our sparkle. One is diet — but not the way many people think. Virtue shared research on histamine and the diet, explaining a low-histamine diet can help with stress levels and more.
“We have a stress hormone we don’t hear about a lot, which is histamine, and it plays a roll in diet and stress, and how it affects the body,” she noted, explaining it’s released from cells when we are exposed to anything toxic or something we are allergic to, and is also released during times of stress. “When it’s released we bloat up, it increases our heart rate and blood pressure, and we can get hot flashes and itchy skin.”
Histamine is also in many of the foods we eat, including fermented foods, anything with vinegar, red wine, and aged foods like cheese and meat. When stressed, people often crave these foods because binging on them temporarily numbs them the same as the histamine released when we get stung by a bee.
“Anyone under a lot of stress, particularly women when they reach menopause, should reduce the histamine in their diet,” she shared.
Additionally, detoxing our environment is also important when looking to regain our sparkle, including getting the chemicals out of our home — which actress Fran Drescher spoke about in the September 2015 cover story of Elevated Existence Magazine.
“The most toxic thing in our house is our bed,” Virtue said. “Every time we turn over on the mattress its emitting chemicals we are breathing in. Switching to an organic, latex mattress, and changing your bedding to organic cotton or bamboo sheets helps.”
She also recommended using organic dry cleaners, and cleaning the home with homemade antibacterial cleaner using essential oils such as tea tree, lavender and eucalyptus oil. And when suffering from stress and anxiety, there are a few natural remedies we can turn to as well.
“Put pure lavender essential oil in a spray bottle with water and spray your pillow,” Virtue said. “Also, using melatonin supplements. Studies show taking them at night help you sleep better and help your brain create more serotonin.”
Additionally, gentle and restorative yoga can not only reduce stress and activate the parasympathetic nervous system, but can also help heal the body and heal trauma.
“It’s clear from all the studies that yoga is the path out of drama addictions and healing from trauma. It’s an antidote to the world’s stress,” she said, explaining in severe cases, counseling with a trauma specialist can help tremendously.
To take her drama quiz, visit www.dontletanythingdullyoursparkle.com.
